This Sunday we will cover Men and Marriage. Like we did with Women and Marriage, we will look at biblical manhood and then how that specifically plays into marriage as husbands. Also like the Women and Marriage sermon, it will be greatly beneficial for single men and also for married and single women alike.

I am asking that all of our men (and invite others) make it a point to be there Sunday. Cancel plans; fly home early if you’re out of town; get a B12 shot if you’re sick; just be there.

My hope for Sunday is this: that men would be greatly in awe at what God has called them to, that they would be challenged and feel the weight of it, but also that they would be encouraged that – while the responsibility they have been given is impossible apart from Christ –  in Christ it is possible! Men are the glory of God (1 Cor 11:7).

Ultimately, my hope is that the Spirit of God would move in a powerful way as the men of our church commit to Jesus, His mission, His church, and His daughters.

We have been graced with great men. We also have good, solid men that desire to grow and be discipled and to learn how to lead out in their calling.

In large part we started this church for the men of this city and because of the men of this city.

I look forward to worshipping with you Sunday.

For His Fame,
Pastor Jim

Despite myself, I am treasured  - counted worthy of a deep, everlasting, sacrificial, incomprehensible love.  I was created for a purpose outside of making my name great.  The breath that I have been blessed with at this very moment is not meant to fuel my own selfish pursuits, but to breathe life into the Gospel at work in this broken world.  Likewise, my marriage was not meant to make me happy, but to point to that which is eternal – the rock that we can cling to – the hope that is always certain – and the truth that brings meaning to our lives. 

I am married to an incredible man.  He is trustworthy and patient – strong and gentle – passionate and courageous. In his arms I feel safe and loved.  He points me to Christ daily through humble service and leadership. Yet, he is a man.  He has disappointed me and hurt me.  And I have done the same.  We are innately selfish beings.  We too often consider ourselves before our spouse, and it can be so much easier to protect our pride than to care for one another.  We try to find meaning in our marriage and it lets us down.

As a woman, I am inclined to rebel against lovingly serving my husband and graciously allowing him to take the lead.  My pride overcomes me, and I begin to believe the lie that my joy is found in happiness.  Why would the Lord call me to set my happiness aside?  Doesn’t He love me?  Doesn’t He want me to be happy? 

It is in our very nature where we are reminded that the things and people in this world will never be fulfilling.  And nothing exposes our nature more than marriage.  Yet, even through the brokenness, God is at work – painting a beautiful picture….

I find joy in marriage because this marriage is not about me.  This marriage is not about serving my husband because he is my everything.  It is about serving my husband through grace, unconditional love and selflessness because Jesus is my everything.  I do not serve my husband, because he demands it – I serve him because he, like our sweet and awesome Savior, is sacrificing everything that we might get more of Jesus.

It is through our marriage that the Lord is painting – stroke-by-stroke – a beautiful portrait of the ultimate marriage between Christ and His Church. So, it is my prayer that even when the individual strokes do not make sense, that I would turn my eyes to the eternal, cling to my sweet Jesus and be reminded that I am loved and treasured not because of anything I have done, but because He died for me even in my brokenness.  And despite the circumstances, I will serve my husband without expecting anything in return and I will love unconditionally knowing that someday I will celebrate with my Savior at the ultimate wedding feast.

Kate Wells is a covenant partner at The Paradox and a member of the Tanglewood City Group

My hope for you this Sunday is this:

1. That you would have a much bigger view of what it means to be a woman than you ever thought or imagined. That you would be amazed at how God has designed you, amazed at the great calling that He has called you too, and overwhelmed by the great magisterial beauty He is making you.

2. That through the word of God and the Spirit of God you would be challenged and convicted.

3. Finally, my hope is that your hope would be in one man – Jesus. For it is Jesus that created you as woman, it is Jesus that has called you to a great calling, it is Jesus that died for you and cleansed you of sin, and it is Jesus that is making you a great magisterial beauty that you cannot even fathom because He is majestic and He is beauty, and He is making you like Him..

For His Fame,
Pastor Jim

Listen to the sermons in the Sex, Singleness, & Marriage series here

I still catch myself thinking I can earn God’s favor.  The devil isn’t creative, but he is persistent. And I know he will try and lure me back to that same lie time and time again.  Truth be told, I am tempted by that lie because I desire it to be true.  I desire for there to be something good and not wholly wretched in me.

Praise God there is something good… there is Jesus and his Holy Spirit in me.  So while I know there will always be a fight, I also know that the victory is won – regardless of my performance in the battle.

Praise God.

Ultimately, the purpose of this blog is to bring glory to the God for the good work He is/will be doing in me and others (Psalm 107).  This blog will do that by broadly sharing my thoughts and feelings about the entire process each week, with no identifying information about others or myself.  The hope is that it will help inform others of what to expect and calm their nerves about actually going through redemption groups themselves.

I easily believe God is withholding marriage from me for fill-in-the blank reason: not spiritually mature enough, not satisfied enough in my relationship with God, I still need to learn some lesson before He will gift me with a husband. Then the “spiritual” lies give way to worldly lies: I’m not attractive enough; I’m too independent; I’m not “girly” enough; I’m too intimidating, and if I “dumb down”, slim down, bat my eyelashes more often, and keep my mouth shut then I’ll be what some guy wants. 

But whatever lie I believe, the fact remains that I am believing lies over the truth. I am placing my hope in being married and not in Jesus. I am judging my worth in light of my relationship status and not in light of Jesus’ death in my place and the resulting unconditional acceptance by the most high God.  And I’m complaining that where God has me, right now, isn’t good enough.

And that is why this quote from a blog by Paige Benton Brown is such a powerful reminder for me. “I am single because God is so abundantly good me, because this is his best for me. It is a cosmic impossibility that anything could be better for me right now than being single. The psalmists confirm that I should not want, I shall not want, because no good thing will God withhold from me.”

Too often I forget. Too often I return to my kingdom of one and make demands to be satisfied. God in his grace doesn’t turn me over to the demands of my flesh, but shows me that my satisfaction is found in Him and ONLY in Him.

I am satisfied in You.

Listen to the sermons in the Sex, Singleness, & Marriage series here

Tara is a covenant partner at The Paradox Church, a Redemption Group Leader, and a member of the Fairmount City Group

In Paige Benton Brown’s classic article on singleness, she addresses some of these issues  and more. Here is an excerpt:

Can God be any less good to me on the average Tuesday morning than he was on that monumental Friday afternoon when he hung on a cross in my place? The answer is a resounding NO. God will not be less good to me tomorrow either, because God cannot be less good to me. His goodness is not the effect of his disposition but the essence of his person—not an attitude but an attribute.

I long to be married. My younger sister got married two months ago. She now has an adoring husband, a beautiful home, a whirlpool bathtub, and all-new Corningware. Is God being any less good to me than he is to her? The answer is a resounding NO. God will not be less good to me because God cannot be less good to me. It is a cosmic impossibility for God to shortchange any of his children…If he fluctuated one quark in his goodness, he would cease to be God.

Warped theology is at the heart of attempts to “explain” singleness:

“As soon as you’re satisfied with God alone, he’ll bring someone special into your life”—as though God’s blessings are ever earned by our contentment.
“You’re too picky”—as though God is frustrated by our fickle whims and needs broader parameters in which to work.
“As a single you can commit yourself wholeheartedly to the Lord’s work”—as though God requires emotional martyrs to do his work, of which marriage must be no part.
“Before you can marry someone wonderful, the Lord has to make you someone wonderful”—as though God grants marriage as a second blessing to the satisfactorily sanctified.

Accepting singleness, whether temporary or permanent, does not hinge on speculation about answers God has not given to our list of whys, but rather on celebration of the life he has given. I am not single because I am too spiritually unstable to possibly deserve a husband, nor because I am too spiritually mature to possibly need one. I am single because God is so abundantly good to me, because this is his best for me. It is a cosmic impossibility that anything could be better for me right now than being single, The psalmists confirm that I should not want, I shall not want, because no good thing will God withhold from me.

“Are you seeing anyone special?” a young matron in my home church asked patronizingly. “Sure,” I smiled. “I see you and you’re special.”

OK, my sentiment was a little less than kind, but the message is true. To be single is not to be alone. If someone asks if you are in a relationship right now, your immediate response should be that you are in dozens.

The group session went really well also.  This week was very celebratory, a few of the participants talked about how God is moving in their life and how much joy they have in Him now.  It was neat because we have all been walking together over the past few weeks, and to see joy and relief on each other’s faces after seeing the burden on their shoulders is nothing short of a miracle. There was also a little anxiety in their voices, which I can identify with — when you are in a place so in sync with God it’s terrifying to know that there will be a time in the near future when you are not.   As a group we recognized that and talked about God’s unwillingness to let us go.  So even though there will be times when I am not fully consumed by His presence and goodness He is still all consuming and good and the truth of that remains forever.

Ultimately, the purpose of this blog is to bring glory to the God for the good work He is/will be doing in me and others (Psalm 107).  This blog will do that by broadly sharing my thoughts and feelings about the entire process each week, with no identifying information about others or myself.  The hope is that it will help inform others of what to expect and calm their nerves about actually going through redemption groups themselves.

We have already seen God moving powerfully through this as He transforms us by the renewing of our minds (Romans 12:2).  We have seen sexual abuse come to light, sexual sin confessed, and marriages have difficult conversations that we pray bring much fruit.

Here is a great summary of what we have covered the last two weeks. Daniel Akin, seminary professor and theologian, outlines the biblical view of sex, I believe it is very helpful (you can listen to the first two sermons, including Q&A here):

God’s Purposes for Giving Us the Good Gift of Sex
• Knowledge (Gn 4:1)
• Intimate oneness (Gn 2:24)
• Comfort (Gn 24:67)
• The creation of life (Gn 1:28)
• Play and pleasure (Sg 2:8-17; 4:1-16)
• Avoiding temptation outside marriage (1Co 7:2-5)

God’s Commands to the Husband
• He is to find satisfaction in his wife (Pr 5:19)
• He is to find joy in his wife (Ec 9:9)
• He is to concern himself with meeting her unique needs (Dt 24:5; 1Pt 3:7)

God’s Commands to the Wife
• She is to be sexually available to her husband (1Co 7:3-5)
• She is to prepare and plan to capture her husband’s heart (Sg 4:9-15)
• She is to show sexual interest in her husband (Sg 4:16; 5:2)
• She is to be sensitive to his unique masculine needs (Gn 24:67)

Biblical Principles to Govern Sex
• Sexual relations within marriage are holy and good. God encourages intimate relations and warns against their cessation (1Co 7:5).
• Pleasure in sexual relations is both healthy and expected. The bodies of both parties belong to the other (Pr 5:15-19; 1Co 7:4).
• Sexual pleasure is to be guided by the principle that one’s sexuality is to be other-oriented. “Rights” over one’s body are given in marriage to our mate (Php 2:3-4).
• Sexual relations are to be regular and normal. No exact number of times per week is prescribed, but the biblical principle is that both parties are to provide adequate sexual satisfaction so that both “burning” (sexual desire) and temptation to find satisfaction outside marriage are avoided (1Co 7:9).
• The principle of satisfaction means that each party is to provide sexual enjoyment (which is “due” him or her in marriage) as frequently as the other party requires. Other biblical principles (moderation, seeking to please another rather than oneself, etc.) also come into play. Consideration of one’s mate is to guide one’s requests for sexual relations.
• In accordance with the principle of “rights,” there is to be no sexual bargaining between married persons (“I’ll not have relations unless you . . .”). Neither party has the right to make such bargains. This is a form of “marital prostitution” and must be avoided.
• Sexual relations are equal and reciprocal. The Bible does not give the man superior rights to the woman or the woman superior rights to the man. Mutual service is the goal.
• Whatever is safe, pleasing, enjoyable, and satisfying to both is acceptable. The body of each belongs to the other (1Co 7:4). Neither should demand from the other what is painful, harmful, degrading, or distasteful to him or her.

I’ve been nervously expectant to see how God works in my life as we journey through the Sex, Singleness, and Marriage series at The Paradox. It would be a lot easier to say that I won’t be directly affected by this series because I’m not married. But I know that each week will directly confront distortions and sinful views I’ve held in the past and reveal some I still struggle with. This series is just as much for me as a single 33-year-old as it is for anyone courting/dating, engaged, newly married, or married for years.

When it comes to sex and being single, it’s easy to believe the lie that I am being denied the gift of sex, that this is something God is withholding from me because I’m not married. This false belief has most often lead to the distorted view of sex as god, as the ultimate prize, and an indulgence in sexual sin.

But when I view sex in light of the biblical explanations of how sex is a gift, it is hard to see it as a gift outside of the covenant of marriage.

1. Sex is for pleasure
Often the approach in teaching abstinence either leaves this out altogether, or distorts it so much that there appears to be no possible way that sex could be pleasurable. Which is completely contradictory to the mountains of evidence that pleasure is the aspect of sex that is most sought after by our culture. Sex was created for pleasure. But when sex happens outside of marriage, pleasure is robbed by insecurities, feelings of guilt and shame, nagging questions about the level of commitment within the relationship, or disappointment when the next sexual encounter doesn’t provide the same pleasurable experience.

2. Sex is for making babies
If ever there was a reason to save sex for marriage, for me, this is it. When sex is pursued outside of marriage, the idea of children, reproduction, the reason we have sex in the most biological of explanations, becomes the most feared. Often a primary objective in sex outside of marriage is preventing children. However, it is clear that prevention of children is not part of God’s design for sex. The prevalence of birth control options, the rising abortion rates, the epidemic of single-parent households all show that outside of marriage, sex is more a curse than gift.

3. Sex is for oneness
Sex is literally joining two bodies as one. There is a connection shared, a bond made – a bond that is not broken just because the bodies are no longer joined. For women especially, this bond is more than just physical. There are hormones released that create feelings of bonding, nurturing, and caretaking (very useful if a baby is made, by the way). Our bodies tell us that we are connected to the person we are having sex with no matter what level of commitment there may be in the relationship. Again turning what was designed to be a part of the gift of sex into a curse.

4. Sex is for knowledge
We all want to be known — to truly have that level of intimacy and knowledge of our innermost thoughts, fears, and motivations. The level of vulnerability implicit in sexual intimacy brings feelings of knowing and being known, and when this is not supported by the commitment of marriage, these feelings are false. It makes it all too easy to believe there are stronger feelings in the relationship than are really there. And makes the hurt that much deeper when the relationship fails.

5. Sex is for protection
Sex within marriage is a gift for protecting sex within the marriage. By indulging in sexual sin outside of marriage we lower our view of sex; it loses meaning; it becomes just an act of selfishly satisfying our own physical needs without concern for how it might affect others. Without the redemptive work of Jesus, we carry this lowered view of sex into marriage and it can become a source of jealousy, self-doubt, and strife between husband and wife. And what was designed to offer protection offers no protection at all.

6. Sex is for comfort
For all the reasons listed above, there is little comfort to be found in sex outside of marriage. The moment of escape creates more problems than it solves, causes more anxiety than stress relief, and the sin separates us from the source of our ultimate comfort, Jesus.

Praise Jesus that he frees us from the bondage of sexual sin! His death cleanses me from all the shame and guilt of a past defiled by a selfish pursuit of sex. And He continues to remind me that He alone is my pleasure, my protection, my comfort, and that I am known more fully than I could ever imagine.

Listen to the sermons in the Sex, Singleness, & Marriage series here

Tara is a covenant partner at The Paradox Church, a Redemption Group Leader, and a member of the Fairmount City Group

If you are wrestling with these things I pray you walk in the light with your City Group. I pray you will seek help and healing. Don’t believe the lie that you will be shamed or cast out from your City Group. Run to the truth that as you walk in the light and confess to one another you will be drawn closer.

Because of who Jesus is and his work on our behalf, our identity is Him not in what we have done or what has been done against us. As you rest in the truth that you are no longer a slave but a child of God, no longer an enemy but a joint heir with Christ, you should be freed up to be honest about your sin – or sin done against you – and seek help. 

My hope for our City Groups through this series is to see the implications of the gospel of Christ Jesus and how to apply it to the sin, suffering, and shame that will arise.

I understand that most of us are bent to offer empty advice and a few short steps, even though we are where we are solely because of Jesus’ transforming grace. I desire for you to listen and love well before offering anything to others. Empathetically enter into their world, incarnate the love of Christ, and identify with their suffering. And when you offer something, may it be Christ and him crucified.

We all need a Redeemer not platitudes or a band-aid. Our hope is the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus, proclaiming Him as the world’s true Lord. One biblical counselor has said, “When we counsel Jesus, we are counseling redemption, not leading people to get better, per se, but leading people to the risen Savior that causes transformation.” As we behold him we are transformed into his image. We become what we worship.

My prayer is for God’s glory seen in transformed lives including strong marriages centered on Jesus, reconciled relationships, healing, forgiveness received from Jesus and extended to perpetrators, sex enjoyed in marriage as a gift from God, pornography and masturbation put to death, selfishness repented of, and much more.

If you still are not comfortable sharing you sin, pain, or suffering with people from your City Group I am available during response-time prayer each week. Or you can email me at ryan@theparadoxchurch.com

I think it is because I feel like I have to have something to give back to God in response to his grace.  That God’s gift was so wonderful I ought to be wonderful for him.  Then I feel awful because I don’t match up to what I think I should be for him.  It is awful and prideful to the core when you think about it.  I see the sin that I commit as against myself- by myself, almost like I just knocked over my own sandcastle.  As opposed to seeing my sin against Christ, seeing how unholy and filthy I am, apart from Him.  How justly I deserve death, apart from Him.  That spurs true repentance in me, a godly grief.  In that, I can see how big the love of my God is for me and how petty any worldly grief I can muster up is in the face of a God so holy.

Ultimately, the purpose of this blog is to bring glory to the God for the good work He is/will be doing in me and others (Psalm 107).  This blog will do that by broadly sharing my thoughts and feelings about the entire process each week, with no identifying information about others or myself.  The hope is that it will help inform others of what to expect and calm their nerves about actually going through redemption groups themselves.

“The answer is that single people cannot live their lives well as singles without a balanced, informed view of marriage. If they do not have that, they will either over-desire or under-desire marriage, and either of those ways of thinking will distort their lives.”

Topics

Sex: God, Gift, or Gross? :: Some who were raised in the church or perhaps heard or experienced sex in a bad way view sex as gross; others view it as a god – its ultimate; but what if it was a great gift from a good God? How would it look then?

Servant Lovers/Selfish Lovers :: How can I be more of a servant and not selfish? What can we do outside the bedroom that helps us inside? What if I don’t want to be intimate with my selfish spouse? What should the sex life of married couples look like? How does it glorify God? How frequent or free should it be?

Singleness & Dating :: How do I glorify God in singleness? Why does it seem that singles are viewed as almost “second-tiered” members in the church? Is singleness a curse or a blessing? How should I pursue a wife? What kind of man should I be looking for? How “far” is too far? When am I ready to be married?

Divorce & Remarriage :: We will look at when it is ok to get divorced or remarried according to the bible.

Women & Marriage :: Is a wife supposed to submit? How does she glorify God in her marriage? What should a wife do if her husband isn’t leading well?

Men & Marriage :: What does it mean to be the “head”? 40% of children go to bed without a father and the majority of the other 60% don’t know what it means to be a godly man.  How are young husbands supposed to know how to lead a family?

Grace & Disgrace :: 1 out of 4 girls have been sexually assaulted and 1 out of 6 boys have. In addition the majority of men and women have had sex already by the age of 16. What do we do with the guilt and shame of sexual sin or sin that has been committed against us?

Join us starting this Sunday for our series on Sex, Singleness, & Marriage

As the group time progressed I had the opportunity to share about my week. Although I had recounted the story a dozen times to concerned friends over the past 5 days, the group was less concerned about the progression of facts or my prediction of the future and more concerned with who God is in the midst of my suffering. Of course they showed genuine concern and empathy, but they also loved me too much to let me wallow in my inability to be my family’s savior. Instead we rejoiced in that very fact and remembered God’s grace in willingly sending Jesus to be the Savior that I am utterly incapable of being.

Ultimately, the purpose of this blog is to bring glory to the God for the good work He is/will be doing in me and others (Psalm 107).  This blog will do that by broadly sharing my thoughts and feelings about the entire process each week, with no identifying information about others or myself.  The hope is that it will help inform others of what to expect and calm their nerves about actually going through redemption groups themselves.

For more information on Redemption Groups go here

After the time of teaching we broke into groups, and, as usual, I was surprised to see how much I share in common with the other participants, how similar our sins and our responses to sin are. I consistently find myself thinking “well I do that too” and looking up to see the other participants nod in agreement. It really got me thinking about how big God really is. In a room of 7 people we all, at some point, have neglected Him or rejected Him. He has shouldered more betrayal than I could ever imagine and at the hands of people who profess to love him, including myself. What is amazing is the fact that Christ still never turns away. He chose me anyway and will abandon me never. It’s incredible.  And in the midst of all of this I saw my personal psalm mirroring the confessions of another group member. After I read my psalm aloud I felt really humbled to know that the God of the Universe used me, in spite of me. It reminded me of Genesis 50:20 where God turns evil intentions into good. He revealed to me the wicked pride in my heart, gave me words to express my repentance, and used those words to comfort one of his other children.

It’s incredible; He is incredible.

Ultimately, the purpose of this blog is to bring glory to the God for the good work He is/will be doing in me and others (Psalm 107).  This blog will do that by broadly sharing my thoughts and feelings about the entire process each week, with no identifying information about others or myself.  The hope is that it will help inform others of what to expect and calm their nerves about actually going through redemption groups themselves.

For more information on Redemption Groups go here

The group meeting time began like the other weeks, with teaching and worship then breaking into our groups. During the discussion I was really surprised at how much I connected with one of the other participant’s story. It seemed like every feeling, thought and experience they had, I had had a similar one. It was neat because I don’t think I have ever been so broken over someone else’s story, felt so convicted over guilt that she felt. For some reason it is always surprising that someone else is like me. I think that is one of the benefits of group time, seeing ourselves in each other, and more importantly seeing Christ’s grace in each other which enables us to better see it in ourselves.

Ultimately, the purpose of this blog is to bring glory to the God for the good work He is/will be doing in me and others (Psalm 107).  This blog will do that by broadly sharing my thoughts and feelings about the entire process each week, with no identifying information about others or myself.  The hope is that it will help inform others of what to expect and calm their nerves about actually going through redemption groups themselves.

For more information on Redemption Groups go here.

I expect peace from God. After all John 14:27 says he gives it. That is my idea of redemption, peace. But often that is not my reality, and I find myself petitioning God for more peace, asking for another hit. I habitually wonder what I need to do to get back on my spiritual high, and I get mad at myself for not being able obtain it. After all Jesus said he has already given peace, it must be me who cannot grab hold. I had been approaching the Almighty Creator like a gumball machine for my emotional sweet tooth.  That in turn, led me (long after my whole group noticed) to what a high view of myself I have and what a disgraceful view of Jesus I have.

This was a tough week, but Lord knows I needed it.

Ultimately, the purpose of this blog is to bring glory to the God for the good work He is/will be doing in me and others (Psalm 107).  This blog will do that by broadly sharing my thoughts and feelings about the entire process each week, with no identifying information about others or myself.  The hope is that it will help inform others of what to expect and calm their nerves about actually going through redemption groups themselves.

For more information on Redemption Groups go here.

It was Henry David Thoreau who said, “A gun gives you the body, not the bird.” Likewise,
in this context, materialism, and the fervid pursuit of it, can provide clutter…but never
contentment.

Therefore, Christians are never defined by the accumulation of items that our hands can hold, but rather by holding steadfast to the pierced hand of our Savior, our truest definition is revealed.

Now there is great gain in godliness with contentment, for we brought nothing into the
world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. But if we have food and clothing,
with these we will be content. But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into
a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and
destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving
that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs.
But as for you, O man of God, flee these things. Pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, steadfastness, gentleness. I Timothy 6:6-11

The American business concept of capitalism denies this passage and defines ‘great
gain’ solely by means of monetary accumulation and market value. However, regardless
of the grandiloquent amount of items accumulated to ‘define’ our ‘self-worth’…in the
end…it…all…burns. [Matthew 3:12, Luke 3:17]

Thus, before God’s Bema Seat of Judgment we will see business giants, household names, and legendary figures standing humbled and ashamed before their Creator amidst their own personal kingdoms of ashes.

Consequently, society’s dependency on materialism as a determining factor of personal ‘worth’ is at the crux of Emil Brunner and Jacques Ellul’s assertion that ‘technology is today’s metaphysic’; where ultimately the only thing that matters is if the outcome works. In stark contrast, the Christian rests in knowing that our ‘outcome’ was attained on the Cross at Calvary and in no greater truth can we possibly find an explanation for our contentment and for our lack of desiring to be defined by the ‘seen’ and ‘temporal’.

Hence, faithfulness with little, amidst a culture that is addicted to excess and finds no satisfaction in any state that doesn’t demand attention and accolades, is VERY unpopular.

We practice our Oscar acceptance speech before we ever even take our first acting class. We imagine our set list while playing to a sold out crowd at Wembley Stadium but give little regard to what we perform at a local outreach with a handful of spectators. We’re too theologically- qualified to assist playing on the floor and wiping noses in the nursery, or cleaning toilets and windows, but feel entitled to be the first person contacted to preach on Sundays in the event that the pastor out of town.

However, without complete faithfulness in all aspects of our stewardship, then any
seemingly ‘insignificant’ thing Christ has called us to oversee will go unappreciated, unvalued, and under-committed. Ultimately, these opportunities serve as a ministerial ‘tar pit’ where we either learn gratitude in serving the Lord in ANY circumstance or we sink into unusable nothingness.

“One who is faithful in a very little is also faithful in much, and one who is dishonest in a
very little is also dishonest in much. If then you have not been faithful in the unrighteous
wealth, who will entrust to you the true riches? And if you have not been faithful in that
which is another’s, who will give you that which is your own?” Luke 16:10-12

Thus, the writer of Hebrews advises Christians everywhere to,” Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” Hebrews 13:5

In valuing Christ above all else we will find rest from this fallen world’ s definitions of ‘value’
and ‘worth’ and discover contentment in all things the Lord entrusts to our lives.

We all need periods of quiescence.

The enemy of our soul makes this very difficult to attain.

However, we belong to a Savior who has said,” Come to me, all who labor and are heavy
laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle
and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my
burden is light.” asks that our ‘cares’ be ‘cast upon Him’ and in return we carry His ‘light
yoke’. Matthew 11:28-30

So, while Red Bull claims to ‘Give You Wings’, Monster urges you to ‘Unleash the Beast’, and Rockstar Energy Drink encourages you to ‘Party like a Rock Star’, they all fall horrifically short of the Lord’s promise to satisfy us completely: ‘Whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” John 4:14

Ezra Boggs is a regular contributor to The Paradox blog.

There is no greater characteristic that displays true Christian maturity than that of contentment. True and genuine contentment demands that we fully rest in the fact that God is sovereign over His creation and we are here for the purpose of glorifying Him. Period.

That said, the very nature of the Fruits of the Spirit that we bear (Gal. 5:22-23) are for those
that our lives come into contact with. Because unlike the uninvolved God of Deism, Christ
was ‘Immanuel, God with us.’ (Matt. 1:23) He walked among the lost, taught them, ate with
them, made Himself fully accessible to the community at large, and with only five syllables
changed the funeral of Lazarus into a contest to see whose eyes and mouth could open the widest.

As Mark Dever rightly explains,  ”You and I cannot demonstrate love or joy or peace or patience or kindness sitting all by ourselves on an island. No, we demonstrate it when the people we have committed to loving give us good reasons not to love them, but we do anyway.”

There is absolutely nothing more shocking than a content being who dwells in the midst of those perishing, running recklessly in pursuit of a godless banner reading ‘live fast / die pretty’. The Apostles experienced this firsthand seeing Christ sleep during a life-threatening storm.

Otherwise, in order to keep pace with a society that will never obey the command to simply ‘Be still, and know that I am God.’ [Psalm 46:10] we shovel gallon after gallon of Red Bull into mouths, forcing ourselves into sleep-depraved states of irritability or depression.

The ‘what’, ‘how’, and ‘why’ of our lives pace should always be in tandem with that which
honors the Lord; the Apostle Paul understood this better than most, thus he could say,” …for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:11-13

In our daily osmosis with the culture around us, while gaining an understanding of it, we must simultaneously weigh that understanding against Scripture thereby to ‘destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ’. II Corinthians 10:5.

In doing so we will find rest from life’s distractions and contentment in Christ.

Ezra Boggs is a regular contributor to The Paradox blog.

Despite the change in objective (the digging), I was looking forward to the group time, since I was a little more familiar with the girls and the format. I thought all week about things to say and bring up. I wanted to talk about how hard it was to remember things I have been trying to forget and to constantly recall the gospel that I am prone to forget. I stored up a lot of juicy introspection for the group. On a side note, I wish I would not of done that. In my effort to save up things for the group time I neglected to let my city group or my friends know what was going on in my life. In doing that, I did not love them well, and I wasn’t allowing them to love me or serve me. I budgeted my burdens instead of surrendering them.

The topic of discussion this week was God’s nearness in our suffering. We began with a couple songs, then the teaching, and then we broke up into groups. In our group time we discussed our sufferings and where we saw God in those awful times. And frankly, this week I left frustrated.  A few of us discussed how our view of God affected our worship and our response to Him. It was frustrating for me because there wasn’t any immediate resolution. It’s messy. It was frustrating for me because we each had a different view of who God is, even though He is only one way.  It was frustrating for me because we are all fighting to get to a place where we believe that God is who he says He is. So I left frustrated, went to bed frustrated, talked to God frustrated, and I woke up grateful.

I am so very grateful that who God is, his unchanging character, is not dependent on my understanding of who he is.

Ultimately, the purpose of this blog is to bring glory to the God for the good work He is/will be doing in me and others (Psalm 107).  This blog will do that by broadly sharing my thoughts and feelings about the entire process each week, with no identifying information about others or myself.  The hope is that it will help inform others of what to expect and calm their nerves about actually going through redemption groups themselves.

For more information on Redemption Groups go here.

Fast forward to 2010, the average cost of a house is $220,000, your grandmother owns her
own .com and broadcasts footage of her ‘rap dancing’ exercise class on YouTube, the average cost of a new car is $27,958, without Microsoft the world would stop functioning, and both Goldman Sachs and Mintel predict that the US energy drink market will hit $10 billion samolians!?

Apparently, we desire to be indefatigable.

But why?

Why on earth would billions be spent in order to consume ingredients that would give a
Starbucks barista a ‘caffeine on steroids’ nightmare?

While I am sure there are many reasons:

• Watching the entire Lord of the Rings Trilogy with bonus footage in one sitting
• Cramming for a Final exam from a book you haven’t cracked open all semester
• Working 72 hours straight in order to raise money for laser removal of a tattoo that reads ‘Kick Me If I’m Not Smiling!’

I’m only going to focus on one; contentment and the lack thereof.

Ezra Boggs is a regular contributor to The Paradox blog.