We Honor Each Other
Written by Jim Essian, published April 2021
Outdo one another in showing honor. — Romans 12:10
In this particular cultural moment, we seem hell-bent on tearing each other down. Literally, hell has been unleashed and we’re all swimming in criticism, shame, cancel culture, and verbal toxicity. The bible has its own terms: enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy (Gal. 5:20–21). These are the works of the flesh. But Christians walking on beat and in rhythm with the Spirit should look different.
And the Spirit inspires and instructs: Outdo one another — make it a competition — of showing honor.
Honor comes from a Hebrew word meaning “to be heavy” or “to give weight.” We always assign weight or importance to someone...we do it when we weigh our options...we’re considering what’s
most important, what to give the most honor.
When we honor someone we are exalting them, lifting them up, shedding light on their value and importance. The opposite of honoring someone is shaming them, putting them down, devaluing them — whether through passive dismissal ("they aren’t important enough for me”) or even public shame (which could be gossiping about them, or anything that puts them down publicly).
Paul Tournier describes this put down culture we all swim in: “In everyday life we are continually soaked in this unhealthy atmosphere of mutual criticism, so much so that we are not always aware of it and we find ourselves drawn unwittingly into an implacable vicious circle: every reproach evokes a feeling of guilt in the critic as much as in the one criticized, and each one gains relief from his guilt in any way he can, by criticizing other people and in self-justification.”
What does it look like to participate in an alternate, Spirit-led culture?
At TPC, one of our cultural values is We Honor Each Other:
“We are brothers and sisters who outdo one another in showing honor. We encourage one another to the glory that will surely be ours in Christ, in the face of a world that seeks to tear each other down.”
Smack in the face of a world that tears down, we are aggressive and intentional to build one another up. Like a middle finger to the world’s ways we don’t just not criticize or slander, we go out of our way to honor each other.
Perhaps Ray Ortlund says it best:
“We who are destined for glory are now commanded by God to create alternative cultures of honor, called churches, where people are lifted up, their accomplishments celebrated, their strengths admired, their weaknesses forgiven. This new relational environment has high standards, in keeping with the glory of the gospel itself. Faithfulness to the gospel requires more of us than adherence to a doctrinal statement; it also requires of us a whole new way to treat one another, a way marked by glory and honor. Who couldn’t flourish there?”
Further Reading
https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/ray-ortlund/showing-honor/
https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/ray-ortlund/brothers-together-in-christ/
Practicing Affirmation - Sam Crabtree