In the Waiting
What happens when our prayers aren’t being answered the way we’re praying? When we’re not getting what we desire or need?
I’m waiting on sleep. The good drool-on-your-pillow-for-eight-hours-straight sleep. Sleep is currently fleeting with a baby who wakes in the night often, along with a toddler who wants into Mama and Daddy’s bed multiple times a night…It’s just my normal right now to not get much sleep. It truly affects every area of my life. Do you know what I’ve learned from months and months of not sleeping? That every matter under the sun is a spiritual battle. What a weird form of suffering sleepless nights can be. But it is no doubt a form of suffering! You can see it on my face in the mornings, bless my husbands sweet heart. It’s suffering because my flesh wants so badly to give in and be moody and on edge whenever I feel like it. I want to give up and not attempt to pursue the hearts of my sweet babies and husband with the passion and love that God has already called me to. Many days I would rather pity myself than to fight for time to get before The Lord and work out the matters of my heart. Instead there are times I choose to power through ignoring my exhaustion by checking out, or as hard as it is to admit, by distracting myself with my phone or activity that doesn’t require thinking. It pains me to think that I can so easily float through the day in this indifferent state not giving my best to my family.But I’m encouraged because there is grace. GRACE! No matter my response Jesus always welcomes me in and offers forgiveness and a hope in Him. God is pleased with me because of Christ. I could seriously write a whole ‘nother blog post about all of the good that has come from this season without sleep. (Maybe I will) but for now I’ll share that my favorite thing I’ve learned is how to rely on God’s strength. Like for real. Not knowing in the morning how I could possibly survive the day chasing two little’s, running a home, making dinner, and loving my husband well. Praying for strength and endurance and a joy that can only come from the Lord. He’s showed up every time I’ve pressed in. I’m not necessarily able to do toe touches at the end of the days, but I am joyful and lacking in nothing.Dear friend, what are you waiting on the Lord for? I have one girlfriend who’s waiting on a baby. Her heart has been waiting on a baby for years…Every month hoping and wishing for a baby. And now she’s painfully awaiting a birth mother’s decision to give her baby up for adoption and at last making my friend a Mother. Oh how she is painfully battling the fear and doubt! She wants to shut down while God is pressing her to trust in Him and His sovereignty and even be excited about the possibility of bringing a baby home soon.Another girlfriend of mine is waiting on a home. She’s been in a long season of waiting for a job for her husband, and now waiting on a home in order to be with her husband. The road has been long and tainted with obstacles and doors closed at every turn, it’s been painful. She’s wondered where God is. Is He really near like He says that He is?
"No matter my response Jesus always welcomes me in and offers forgiveness and a hope in Him. God is pleased with me because of Christ."
Our struggles big and small point to the fact that life is broken…something is off. Life is hard sometimes isn’t it? You don’t have bad luck, you’re not cursed, and it’s not a coincidence. Even the most annoying days where you get a flat tire, trip on air, forget an important appointment, and get fussed at by your man, is not a coincidence. What an empty belief that life is hard for no darn reason! Let our strife here on earth lead us to Jesus. Praise Him that we don’t have to power through, or just accept that life sucks sometimes. He is able to stir us to worship when circumstances are hard. He is able to bring us joy when we’re waiting…He IS able to answer our prayers, but if you’re waiting know that it’s not a coincidence. He knows your heart! He has something for you in the waiting. Friends, He transforms us in the waiting if we look to Him. We come out on the other side more joyful, more hopeful, more loving towards others, and most importantly, more trusting of our good God. Oh how He loves us! Press in…humble yourself before the Lord. Remember that the enemy is looking for someone to devour. Put on the full armor of God…link arms with good believing friends, study His word, and pray. And then keep at it. Deep breath…let’s turn from our sinful response to this suffering and turn to Jesus. Even if it means doing so a billion times a day. Run the race with endurance!James 1:2-4Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.Ecclesiastes 7:8Better is the end of a thing than its beginning, and the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit.Isaiah 41:30But they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.Isaiah 41:13For I, the LORD your God, hold your right hand; it is I who say to you, “Fear not, I am the one who helps you.”Jeremiah 29:11-13For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.Hosea 6:1Come, let us return to the LORD; for he has torn us, that he may heal us; he has struck us down, and he will bind us up.Heather Essian is a member of the Monticello City Group. This post is a re-post from her personal blog, which you can find here.