Jesus' Church: Chris and Priscilla Schulze
The Schulzes are a part of the Near Southside City Group, Chris leads the Security Team for our Sunday evening gathering, Priscilla serves in Kids City, and they attend the 11am gathering on Sundays. This is their story. This is what Jesus is doing in his church.
When we first got married we thought we had it all figured out. We had each been married once before and felt the mistakes and lessons learned in our prior marriages were setting us up for a marriage full of forgiveness, tenderness, long talks about our feelings, financial maturity and stability and of course, the much desired children. Our checklist was great but the one thing we were missing in our marriage was our trust in God.Chris had just recently been saved and I had been saved since the age of 11. We both knew who God was and as much as we thought we trusted Him and put Him first in our lives, when we actually sat down and were honest with ourselves (4 years later) the Holy Spirit quickly revealed to us that there was much work to be done.
"The respect I so desired to give my husband was overpowered by my need for control..."
Our hearts were willing and eager to know Him more and rid our lives of junk so we could more clearly see His plan for our lives. Deep down, I longed to be a submitted wife but I found myself destroyed by pride and unforgiveness. The respect I so desired to give my husband was overpowered by my need for control and the weight I constantly placed on my 'perfect' Chris' shoulders kept falling back on me 10 tons heavier!
Through a humbling Redemption Group process, I began to see that I was enslaved to that sin, to the detriment of my marriage. As I had a better understanding of who God is as my heavenly Father, it was quickly revealed to me that I thought I made a better god than God. I absolutely minimized the sacrifice God made for me and obviously thought that I could forgive when I wanted and submit only when I thought it had been earned and only when necessary.
“you are just as unworthy of forgiveness as he is and yet I love you and forgive you over and over”
I figured as long as I could "control" those things Chris could take care of everything in between, and more. The pressures I put on Chris, God has taught me are unfair and God is the only one that can and will carry my burdens! This has since softened my heart for my husband and brought on an eagerness to respect and submit to him as God commands me to do. The unforgiveness I harbored towards Chris was shattered when God spoke very clearly to me saying “you are just as unworthy of forgiveness as he is and yet I love you and forgive you over and over.” How humbling it was to feel that pride just vanish and for the first time feel the arms of God that have always been there, wrap around his wretched daughter!I have watched as Chris humbles himself before a God much greater than he. The hard walls of his heart break down and are replaced with a new sense of childlike desires lit like a passionate flame in his heart. The molding and sculpting the Holy Spirit is doing in his heart is clear to me. It's evident in his pursuing of our sweet daughters’ hearts, the loving yet firm parenting he leads out in and in the way he takes my hand to pray with me. God is glorified daily in our marriage as we obediently put sinful tendencies to death!
"The hard walls of his heart break down and are replaced with a new sense of childlike desires lit like a passionate flame in his heart."
When reflecting back on our life prior to this chipping away the Holy Spirit is doing, we see how lovingly and patiently God has always pursued us. The joyful opportunity we have to speak of God's redeeming love and grace in our lives as we share our story with others is one that humbles us to worship and praise our amazing Father! He has renewed us with a hunger to serve and love others as He did.
Although I still struggle with unforgivness and my pride gets the best of me at times, and Chris' hard heart sometimes gets ahead of him, our hope and strength is constantly renewed and now rests with confidence and joy in a much greater God than we can or ever will create for ourselves.We rest easy in Ephesians 3:20-21: “Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.”
